Now this is the story of young Freddie Lawes,
Who's sexual equipment got jammed in the doors,
By the time they freed him, he didn't feel too well,
As his poor private parts were mangled to hell!
They rushed him to hospital, the ambulance flew,
But when they arrived, there was little they could do,
What a sad blow for Freddie, condemned with choice,
To a life without sex, and a high squeaky voice!
But lucky for Fred, so as not to feel a fool,
Some bright young spark thought of a bionic tool,
A smart new electric one, made out of brass,
So the batteries would have to be stored up his ass!
Now, with the new equipment and a rest,
Freddie said "Now for the test",
So he found a woman, the nearest one handy
and he supplied her with drinks to make her feel randy!
She without thinking put her hand in Freddie's flies,
When she felt what was there, she gave a cry of surprise,
"That's my bionic chopper, let's have some fun",
"God Blimey", she said, "It felt like a gun!"
They both stripped off quick, Freddie entered her first,
Then he turned on the speed knob and gave her full blast,
They clung to each other as Fred over shot some more,
Then they bounced off the Bed and onto the floor!
Now the pace hotted up, they started to choke,
As the air in the room filled up with blue smoke,
With a big bang Freddie's left bollock shot up in the air,
Then the right one went bang and bounced down the stairs!
Then back to repair went poor Freddie, full of woe,
Was this how his sex life, was destined to go!
To return to his Doctor, at the end of each shag,
With his prick in his pocket and his balls in a bag.
But they fixed up young Freddie, made him manly again,
And they helped out his batteries with a flex to the main,
Now if he can't get a girl, lucky Fred doesn't cry,
Because his A/C D/C can go with a guy!